Scarecrow (one small measure of spirit)

EXT. (day)

A BLACK MAN walks along a narrow country lane. A tractor drives past (travelling in the same direction, towing a trailer with two COLLIES on). The BLACK MAN and the DRIVER stare at each other as they pass, both of them looking a bit lairy, but the driver clearly more arrogant.

The BLACK MAN continues walking. The POV is the back of his shoulders and head. He straightens his jacket, pulling it up and over his shoulders.

INT. (day)

The BLACK MAN is dressed as a knight in armour. He has a lance and has his foot on a dragon. The POV zooms out. He is in a studio.

EXT. (day)

A city. The POV is of a police car, stopped. The POLICEMAN is framed in the window.

POLICEMAN

So, what are you doing, George?

GEORGE

Nothing. Just going home.

POLICEMAN

Home?

GEORGE

Yeah, down the road.

POLICEMAN

Which road?

GEORGE

Any one I fucking want.

POLICEMAN

(beginning to rant)

Look…

EXT. (day)

George is standing still on the country lane. Around are the countryside and the sound of birds. There are several loud bangs as crowscarers go off.

EXT. (day)

Looking down at GEORGE walking along the lane. The POV turns left, still focusing on GEORGE.

EXT. (day)

A rook hanging upside down on a piece of string from a tree. The POV zooms back and GEORGE can be seen below and on the other side of the rook, staring at it. He turns and starts walking, pulls a packet of chewing gum out of his coat and unwraps a piece. He drops the silver paper and it floats down to the ground in slo-mo.

Big BANG as a crowscarer goes off right by his head. Then another one.

EXT. (day)

GEORGE lying on his back, dressed in armour, his BULL MASTIFF (with a spiked collar) going mad next to him, defending him.

EXT. (day)

GEORGE walks past a house on the same lane with kids playing in the garden. They all stop playing and stare at him. The little boy drops a stick.

INT. (day)

GEORGE is in a pub. He presses and flattens a bank note onto the bar, the Queen’s head visible. The BAR WOMAN is looking at him a little curiously/suggestively. There are another THREE PEOPLE in the pub. They are all sat down, staring at him. GEORGE turns around, but they carry on staring.

BAR WOMAN

Don’t worry about them. They’re just interested. We don’t see many … many…

GEORGE

(ironically)

…What about you?

BAR WOMAN

Drink?

GEORGE

Guinness (pauses). When in Rome and all that.

Quick zoom to one of the MEN in the pub. He glances sideways at his MATE.

INT. (day)

A shot of GEORGE’s back. He is sat on a stool. To the left of him you can see his hand holding a tumbler with whisky in. In the background is a poster about measures of alcohol.

GEORGE

One small measure.

BAR WOMAN

What?

GEORGE

That’s what my uncle always used to say, ‘You only get one small measure’.

INT.

The pub is absolutely heaving with people and everyone is dancing and having an amazing time. GEORGE is there, laughing.

EXT. (night)

It’s dark and GEORGE is swinging an axe, getting ready to chop down a telegraph pole. SHOUTS of encouragement from the gathered crowd, and laughter as the axe swings close to someone’s head. Quickly zooms back. There are TWO PEOPLE talking to one another. The POV is head-and-shoulders from behind. MAN ONE’s head fills most of the shot. There is the sound of someone having a piss off-camera.

MAN ONE

I haven’t seen this since 1969. Bill Chapman chopped one down in four-and-a-half minutes.

MAN TWO

It was five-and-a-half, you old bastard.

MAN ONE

Four-and-a-half, I swear. Anyhow, this boy’ll beat that; look at the bloody size of him.

MAN TWO

So, what do you say? A little wager? I think I remember you saying Bill lopped one down in four-and-a-half minutes.

MAN ONE

Maybe it was five-and-a-half.

MAN TWO

You swear?

MAN ONE

Go on, then, the usual (pauses); that he beats four-and-a half minutes.

MAN TWO just smiles smugly.

EXT. (night)

The POV is from above the crowd as GEORGE swings the axe behind his head. The POV moves through and down to the crowd at high speed as if it were a mosquito flying. Then it stops at MAN TWO’s hand, which has a pocket watch in it. The second hand is 10 seconds from 12 o’clock. Everything is silent for five seconds, then MAN TWO calls out the countdown from ‘five’. You can just see the blurred outline of GEORGE at periphery of the shot. The second hand begins spinning quickly (there may be some cuts to other shots in this period). After three-and-a-half minutes the second hand slows to real time:

MAN TWO

(shouting all around him)

He better get a hurry on. (laughs)

The second hand begins spinning quickly again.

EXT. (night)

The POV is from above the telegraph pole, looking down.

MAN THREE

(shouting all around him)

It’s going.

EXT.

The face of MAN TWO looking slightly crestfallen.

EXT. (night)

Back of MAN ONE’s head.

MAN ONE

Four minutes twenty-three. That’s mine, Jim. Let’s have it.

He turns his head, looking surprised. He turns around, looking surprised, the POV remaining the same, but MAN TWO has gone.

GEORGE is waking up in an open-sided hay barn, on top of a stack of bales. There is the rattling of a bird knocking a snail against the metal roof. Then silence, before VOICES float in from off-screen. GEORGE carefully rolls over and looks down. There are TWO men below. MAN ONE has a green canvas holdall. He puts it into the hedge and balances a sheet of old, corrugated iron on top. The men turn and walk off in different directions. As they walk away, MAN ONE pats MAN TWO on the shoulder.

MAN ONE

Later.

MAN TWO

Yeah, see you at three.

EXT. (day)

The POV pans over the barn roof and straight down. GEORGE is already climbing down the outside of the bales. He jumps to the ground, walks over to the bag as he lights a cigarette. Then he peers carefully under the corrugated iron, pulls out the bag and drops it on the ground. There is a huge BANG.

EXT. (day)

The same position as the beginning of the last shot, but looking out and across the sky. There is the CALLING of crows.

END